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Speider Schneider | Elance
 
176985602337900
Last Sign-in: Sep 10, 2014

Speider Schneider

Writer, Blogger, Copywriter, SEO Expert
   United States
  |  5:11 pm Local Time

Overview

Specializing in humor, headlines, taglines, greeting cards, conversational articles, political and lifestyle opinion pieces, professional business practices and slice-of-life pieces. SEO/keywords has my articles reposted in 160K to over 1M blogs and online publications. A recent article garnered 27.7 million Google returns and 5.1 million StumbleUpon likes. New clients experience a 400%-600% rise in hits from my articles and blog posts.

Former member of the Usual Gang of Idiots at MAD Magazine, writer for Hallmark and American Greetings,...

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Apr 24, 2013|Other - Writing Services|$45|Completed
|
4.4
Jun 10, 2011|E-books and Blogs|$384|Completed
|
5.0
Feb 14, 2011|Copywriting|$110|Completed
|
5.0
Feb 11, 2011|Copywriting|$110|Completed
|
5.0

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Skills (1)

Tested
Online Writing
Online Article Writing and Blogging Test (U.S. Version)
My Score
avg

Service Description

I'm a top professional with the credentials to prove it.

"Speider's quips always leave me in hysterics. Much too funny for greeting cards. Much too funny for Saturday Night Live. There needs to be a new comedy show for him to write (preferably not in prime time!)."
- Anthony Pafford, Creative Process Specialist, Hallmark Cards, Inc.

"Do you want words? Do you want them to be *funny* words? Speider knows all about words, how to make them funny, and even how to string them together into intelligible sentences! He'll shock and entertain and scandalize all while deftly slipping your marketing messages into the unwitting minds of your new customers. If you want boring and safe, go somewhere else. If you want what works, this is your man."
- Joshua Jeffryes, President, J. Jeffryes Design, Inc.

"You may not agree with Speider's politics, which can be so far to the left that communists quake in fear, or so far to the right that conservatives switch parties but he always makes an argument that makes you think. He's one of a kind!"
- G. Robert (Bob) Bishop, President, Executive Recruiter, Bishop Partners, LLC

"There's a method behind Speider's MAD-ness. We were just too afraid to find out what it was and let him create without boundaries."
- David Erwin, Executive Creative Director, DC Comics/Warner Bros. Entertainment

"Speider was always a great contributor in brainstorms. He would never disappoint when it came to humor, and though at times a bit much for Hallmark...

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Keywords

humor
greeting cards
writer
blogger
My Snapshot
Writing & Translation
1
Elance Level
Level represents activity and experience on Elance. Freelancers start at Level 1 and achieve higher levels through their work. A higher "Level" indicates greater earnings, ratings and other achievements on Elance. Learn More »
  • 12 months
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Identity
Username
SpeiderSchneider
Type
Individual
Member Since
August 2010
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Speider Schneider | Elance

Speider Schneider